Nuffnang

Showing posts with label Smile. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Smile. Show all posts

Friday, May 30, 2014

Lying Smiles and other signs of deception

adopted from 'Emotionomics' by Dan Hill 

The presence of a social smile may simply reveal a degree of enjoyment that falls short of spirited, joyful happiness. Consumers or employees who are pleased with what they’ve received may nevertheless not experience an exalted happiness. That’s because, while their expectations were met, they were not exceeded. How they then respond to being satisfied, but not thrilled, could involve the exhibiting of a social smile. But if there’s pressure to be happy about the raise a boss has just given you, for example, the employee may gamely put a happy face on the situation. Or a prospect put off by a salesperson’s overly aggressive style may exhibit a social smile to hide the fact that the deal is headed south.
 
In those cases, a degree of deception is involved. And later on, the manager or salesperson may wish he or she had been able to tell from the other party’s facial expressions that the end was near. But alas, there is no one muscle movement that categorically reveals deception.
 
What better example for deceit than the classic clown face?
 
Painted to look like it’s always full of smiles, one glance beneath the makeup can dispel the myth of continuous merriment.
 
Facial coding does much the same thing by gleaning true, unfiltered, positive or negative emotional reactions.
 
Bear in mind that while Adolf Hitler practised his speeches in front of a mirror to test his accompanying expressions, most of us aren’t that deliberate. All of us can adequately guard against ‘two-faced’ people whose smiles aren’t the real thing by being alert to a few, basic situations
or patterns.
 
In particular, be alert to a polite, masking smile in situations where:
 
  • It doesn’t involve the whole face. The cheeks will lie flat and still and the eyes don’t narrow as they do during a genuine smile.
  • It lingers too long. A true smile tends to fade around the four-second mark. A false smile may run from five to ten seconds.
  • It has odd timing. A deceitful smile tends to start or end too abruptly or arrive too early or late. A smile may also be deceitful if what the person is saying and the expression are out of sync.
  • It’s asymmetrical and much more pronounced on just one side of the face. That happens because the smile is likely to have been consciously delivered.
  • Finally, watch out for smiles given when the person’s face hints of other, darker emotions at or near the same time. In a case of mixed signals like happiness and anger, be careful not to discount the anger on display.

That last description of a deceitful smile involves what Ekman (1992) calls ‘leakage’. Basically, it amounts to unintended, fleeting glimpses of what the person is really feeling. On a related note, a micro-expression may happen because of ‘squelches’. These occur when a person interrupts his or her natural expression, usually to cover up a negative feeling with a smile. The squelch is something skilled politicians the world over attempt to master.

Monday, September 10, 2012

Open Gestures and Smiles


Open body gestures and welcoming smiles are great ways to attract person into our own personal space – simply by making it inviting

Use open body gestures to create open territory lines which someone will be attracted to move in principle it means we should create the illusion of being a rewarding door at the end of a triangle-shaped corridor towards which people will automatically be drawn. We want people to feel that the door at the end of the door is inviting, tempting, exciting, and maybe even a little dangerous. Simultaneously we can give out warm rays of sunlight into which people wish to step. Being in the rays makes them feel good, and in feeling good they are more attracted to the source of smiles, plenty of open gestures, inviting body postures and a quieter rather than loud voice.

If you decide to invade someone’s personal space you must override their fear or anger responses by giving them a high dose of positive non-verbal messages. You should move towards them slowly and gently, exchanging brief bursts of eye contact interspersed with lowered eyes, all the time punctuated with a symmetrical smile and small nodding and encouraging movements of the every five seconds or so. Meanwhile, keep your hands open and expressive and your attitude light and easy rather than intense.

When you speak, ask questions, listen to their answers, be positive, flattering, warm and complementary about them, their tastes, their home – whatever your complement, they must know your words are really meant for them. Smiles elicit smiles. If you can get someone to open up with a smile their body language and unconscious feelings will soon follow. When we smile, our mood immediately lifts. With an elevated mood comes relaxation and pleasure.