When Feet Shift Direction, Particularly Toward or Away from a Person or Object (by Joe Navarro)

We tend to turn toward things we like or are agreeable to us, and that includes individuals with whom we are interacting. In fact, we can use this information to determine whether others are happy to see us or would prefer that we leave them alone. Assume you are approaching two people engaged in a conversation. These are individuals you have met before, and you want to join in the discussion, so you walk up to them and say “hi.” The problem is that you’re not sure if they really want your company. Is there a way to find out? Yes. Watch their feet and torso behavior. If they move their feet - along with their torsos - to admit you, then the welcome is full and genuine. However, if they don’t move their feet to welcome you but, instead, only swivel at the hips to say hello, then they’d rather be left alone.

We tend to turn away from things that we don’t like or that are disagreeable to us. Studies of courtroom behavior reveal that when jurors don’t like a witness, they turn their feet toward the nearest exit. From the waist up, the jurors politely face the witness who is speaking, but will turn their feet toward the natural “escape route”- such as the door leading to the hallway or the jury room.

What is true for jurors in a courtroom is also true for person-to-person interactions in general. From the hips up, we will face the person with whom we are talking. But if we are displeased with the conversation, our feet will shift away, toward the nearest exit. When a person turns his feet away, it is normally a sign of disengagement, a desire to distance himself from where he is currently positioned. When you are talking with someone and you note that he gradually or suddenly shifts his feet away from you, this is information you need to process. Why did the behavior take place? Sometimes it is a signal that the person is late for an appointment and really has to go; other times it is a sign that the person no longer wants to be around you. Perhaps you have said something offensive or done something annoying. The shifting foot behavior is a sign that the person wants to depart. However, now it is up to you - based on the circumstances surrounding the behavior - to determine why the individual is anxious to go.

 I think the guy on the left is in a rush!

Books by Joe Navarro 

Want to Send a Strong Rapport-Building Message with Proxemics?

With you walk near someone else's space, pause and stay out of it. Initiate your conversation and then about 30 seconds into the conversation, open your palm to their chair in front of you.

“May I?”

You've now been authorised into their space.

Typically, the person doesn't feel comfortable at this point.

Stay with your back in the chair.

Talk about something that does not require the privacy of a really soft spoken voice.

Then when you are going to communicate something that is of greater concern, lean forward a bit in the chair.

This will show respect, appreciation, and liking for your counterpart.

 Books about gestures in business communications

  

Body Language

We may not have noticed that in our daily face-to-face conversations, the words we speak is only constitute for less than 10% of the message we are conveying, the rest would be coming from our body language (non-verbal behaviour) and paralinguistic cues. According to Albert Mehrabian, a researcher in the 60s, the more precise of the composition of the information we picked up from a conversation would be 7% from the word itself, 38 % from tone, inflection and the speed of voice, lastly 55% from the body language, or more scientifically known as non-verbal signals.

Body language is important when we are interacting with people everyday. Our body let out messages constantly and usually we don't recognise that we are communicating a lot more than we realise. If we are feeling happy it can easily show in how we 'compute' on our body languages. When we talk, if we look at someone else’s body we can often tell how they are feeling by the signals their body is giving. Say if your words say one thing but your body says another, your counterpart is more likely to believe the message your body is sending out to be more reliable. It is useful to be able to read people’s body language, but it is equally useful to learn how to get our body to send the right signals and minimise the wrong signals. In this blog, we will explore more on how to start using body language to improve daily communications and to improve the quality of life.

'If the eyes are the windows of the soul, then the body is the mirror of our feelings.'

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